Here Is A Fun Free All You Can Eat Pocket Guide For Marriage… In Case You Need It!
Ancient Roman Marriage (Just For Fun)
We know that ancient Romans got married, but were ancient Roman marriages similar to how we view marriage today? Read on to learn more about this fascinating subject.
Ancient Roman marriage was not about love or shared goals at all. In fact, it was more about financial matters and political aspirations than romance. This was especially true for those people who were living at the higher end of the social ladder.
Ancient Roman Marriage for the Upper Classes
It was the duty of a father to find a suitable husband for his daughter or daughters, starting beginning when were between the ages of 12 and 14 years. The husband selected would almost always be older than his bride. This could be a few as a couple of years older or the young lady might be expected to marry someone three times her age.
Normally, in matters of ancient Roman marriage, the bride-to-be was expected to have little or no input into the choice of husband. In addition, according to the ancient Roman marriage traditions, she was expected to have absolutely no objections to the plans being made for her life.
Some young ladies did have a bit of a say in which they would be married off to. Apparently, Cicero’s wife and daughter made the choice of spouse for the daughter, all the while assuming that Cicero would be in agreement. He was.
Ancient Roman Marriage in the Lower Classes
Lower class women were generally married a little later in their lives. By later in their lives, this means that they were married in their late teens or early twenties. In this form of ancient Roman marriage, it was not as urgent a matter, since it was not about political and economic gain.
The Engagement Ceremony
Both family and friends were invited to an engagement ceremony before the wedding. During the ceremony, the father of the bride-to-be was asked whether he promised to give his daughter in marriage. He was expected to respond that he did. The bride-to-be was given some gifts at the ceremony, including a ring, which was to be worn on the middle finger. It was thought at that time that the middle digit contained a certain nerve that ran straight to a person’s heart.
The Wedding Ceremony
The most formal type of wedding ceremony in ancient Rome was celebrated in front of 10 witnesses. The bride was passed from her father’s household to her new husband’s.
A less formal ceremony could also be conducted in front of five witnesses. This was actually the more common form of marriage ceremony at the time. The groom was expected to pay a penny; he received the bride in exchange. Once again, the bride becomes part of her new husband’s household.
Alternatives to Marriage
Some women, known as concubines, had sexual relationships with a married man. They oftentimes would live together. Any children of their union were considered illegitimate, since their own relationship was not legitimate. Some women became concubines of married men because their families were not able to afford to provide a dowry for them. This was considered an embarrassment.
Many slaves lived in this manner. The relationship was not meant to be permanent; it was only supposed to last until the slaves had gained their freedom.
Courtesans also existed at this point in time. These women lived either with their mothers and sisters or in an apartment provided by whatever man they were involved with at the time. Unlike prostitutes, they usually had only one lover at any given time.
As you can see, there were certain traditional rituals surrounding ancient Roman marriage. Like our society today, there were also alternatives to the traditional-marriage lifestyle.
A Venerable Tradition: The History of Marriage
The history of marriage has its origins as least as far back as antiquity and evidence of marriage traditions and ceremonies have existed among people of almost all cultures. While today when we think of marriage our thoughts turn to notions of love and romance, this has not always been the case.
The marriage in the earliest times had little to do with notions of romantic love and more to do with survival. It is believed that the earliest weddings were group events, designed to join together different tribes into a larger family to support and protect each other. The practice of paying a dowry to the family of the bride or the groom, which could include land as well as other types of property, has served throughout the history of marriage to ensure property rights among kinship groups.
Rules governing whom one could marry have existed throughout the history of marriage, and religious and civil law have contained restrictions that have limited marriage options, and intermarriage within a kinship group has often been forbidden. Many countries today continue to enforce laws that prohibit marriage between certain relatives.
Throughout the history of marriage, the majority of unions have been arranged, where the parents have selected whom their children will marry. While the tradition continues in some cultures today, most modern marriages are based on romantic love, with couples deciding freely to marry.
Many of the traditions surrounding contemporary weddings can be traced throughout the history of marriage. Wedding rings date as far back as Egyptian society, where the circle symbolized eternity. The Egyptians’ belief that the fourth finger of the left hand was connected to the heart established the tradition of wedding rings being worn on that finger.
The multi-layered, highly decorated cakes that are common today are a recent addition to the wedding ceremony, first becoming popular around the late nineteenth century. They replaced the loaves of bread that were historically broken during the wedding ceremony.
The tradition of bridegrooms in the wedding party is said to have its roots in the era of very early history when a man would rely on his friends to abduct a woman from her family for his bride. The practice of bridegrooms and bridesmaids dressing alike is a long-standing one in the history of marriage, based on the superstition, which holds that evil spirits might wish harm on the couple and the similarity in dress would confuse them.
While we think that white wedding dresses have always been popular, the tradition is a recent one in the history of marriage, with its origins in 1840, when Queen Victoria wore a white gown at her wedding to Prince Albert of Saxe. By the turn of the twentieth century, most brides in western cultures embraced the white wedding dress.
Many people of many cultures have embraced ceremonial symbols practiced in ancient wedding ceremonies today. The marriage ceremony in Bali includes the couple eating a dish of yellow rice, a symbol of fertility, and in the West rice is thrown at weddings to wish the couple fertility, prosperity and luck.
Common law marriages, defined as when a couple lives together without obtaining a marriage certificate, have been recognized throughout the history of marriage. Some governments continue to recognize common law marriages after the couple has lived together for a certain amount of time. Most governments today, however, require that couples register their union and obtain some type of marriage certificate as legal proof of their relationship.
So while we can see, while much has changed throughout the history of marriage since ancient times, many of our contemporary traditions have deep historical roots.
Upward Trend in Interracial Marriage
At one time it was almost unheard of to have an interracial marriage within your neighborhood, never mind your family, but today, the boundaries of the world are shrinking and tolerance of the unknown and the different is – for the most part – increasing as we discover that despite differences in our beliefs and our culture, fundamentally we are all very much alike. As immigrants from one nation descend upon another nation and call it home, so the cultures blend and so it’s inevitable that from this mixed race culture that interracial marriage occurs.
Not everyone is happy about the upward trend in interracial marriage however. There are those who believe that mixing the races in this way will end with the obliteration of most races and with one or two large mixed races taking their place. This could well be right over a large number of generations, already today we see many children of obvious mixed race background in the school yard – but is this really such a dreadful thing? An interracial marriage is one of the most positive steps for a world that is no longer interested in picking at the differences between one culture and another, but instead, focuses not only on the similarities but also the strengths that one race can share with another.
Although there is personal prejudice in some areas against interracial marriage, this is usually nothing more than an opinion based upon fear. Unfortunately for some cultures however, this prejudice is more than that. Some cultures frown upon their children mixing with other races. They think it a matter of family shame if one of their own marries out into a different race – this can have dangerous consequences for the people involved as the culture tries to defend what it believes to be a matter of honor. Despite this being a characteristic of the cultures involved, it’s a situation that needs looked at when these cultures are living in countries where basic freedoms to choose are common for all people who live there, even those born into a culture that doesn’t, for the most part, believe this is right.
Past generations have dealt with issues regarding mixed religion marriages. Not everyone is still happy about these marriages taking place. Certain churches take steps to ensure that the couple, and any children that come from the union, are taken care of in one religion or the other – usually requiring that one person convert to the religion of the other. Amongst the general public however, people aren’t usually judgmental against people from different religions marrying, even if they don’t agree with it. In the years to come, it’s to be hoped that a similar situation as regards interracial marriage will occur so that people have a right to marry the right person for them, regardless of which race they are from.
Marriage should be something that is private between two individuals, and not something to be dictated by society or cultural groups. The person you spend your life with ought to be a personal decision, and if an interracial marriage occurs as a result of that decision, then the couple ought to be encouraged for taking a path of learning each other’s ways rather than frowned upon for marrying outside of their own race.
Hopefully one or two generations from now, as the children from these tentative first interracial marriages start to create their own marriages, the boundaries will be further relaxed and people will be allowed to love and live as they choose, rather than have their choices narrowed to one race for no other reason than that’s how it’s always been done and therefore should always be done. Prejudice affects freedom, if freedom is to be embraced by all races living in a democratic country, then that freedom must cover everything – up to and including freedom for an uncontested interracial marriage.
All About Marriage Contracts
A marriage contract is a legally-binding document between two people. The people involved can be either about to be married or may already be married to each other. If you sign a document of this type before the wedding, it will take effect the day of the wedding. In the case of people who are already married, it will take effect immediately. The contract contains a set of promises the couple makes to each other.
Independent Legal Advice
Both parties to the contract should get separate legal advice before signing it. This is good advice in the event that a person is going to enter into any type of contract, not just one with his or her spouse.
The lawyers involved will make sure that each party to the contract understands the terms and conditions contained in the document. If necessary, they will arrange for the signing of the contract to be witnessed.
Financial Issues
Generally speaking, a marriage contract deals with financial issues, namely how assets will be divided in the event of a divorce. It may also include provisions for how property will be managed during the marriage.
With people tending to get married after they have finished school and started a career, the chances of them having accumulated some assets beforehand is greater. The couple may want the agreement to specify that each person will retain ownership of any property he or she brought into the marriage.
Another provision might specify that in the event of the marriage breaking down, one spouse has the right to stay in the family home (at least for a certain period of time) and will receive a certain percentage of the family assets. The contract may also specify that the lower-earning spouse will be entitled to financial support of a specific amount each month.
Fairness
It is important that whatever agreement spouses enter into be fair. The reason why people sign marriage contracts in the first place is so that they can avoid a long period of litigation if their marriage breaks down. If the agreement is not fair to both parties (or even if one party feels that it is unfair), he or she can take the matter to court and ask a judge to set aside the marriage contract.
Who Needs a Marriage Contract?
People entering second marriages or those with children are more likely to take the step of having a marriage contract. They may have assets that they would like to see pass to their children intact. If no such contract is signed, the other spouse may well be able to make a claim for a financial interest in a real estate holdings, investments, etc.
At a later date, the spouses can opt to make changes to their original agreement. This would need to be in writing and once again, each person would do well to seek out independent legal advice before signing anything.
What is a Ketubah?
A ketubah is a different form of marriage contract. Under the provisions of the Jewish faith, it is forbidden for couples to cohabit without one. The ketubah is a document that sets out the basic moral, financial, and conjugal responsibilities that a husband has toward his wife. It is designed to protect the rights of the woman during her marriage and in the event that she is widowed or divorced at some point in time.
The document, which is written in the ancient language of Aramic, is signed by the groom in front of two witnesses and given to the bride as part of the wedding ceremony.
Arranged Marriage
Arranged marriage sounds like something from ancient times, but believe it or not this still goes on today in many countries. An arranged marriage is just like it sounds, a marriage that was arranged by the parents; sometimes the bride and groom didn’t even know one another.
An arranged marriage has a lot of history behind it and for the cultures that have this they take pride in it. Where many of us frown upon it and get angry at the thought of making someone marry someone they don’t want to marry, however we never really stop and think about the way the culture is. For many countries there is honor in the arranged marriage, their families are helping them choose whom to marry. Those people that hold the tradition find it like betrayal if the bride or groom decides against marrying each other. It is very much like a slap in the face. In fact it is so serious that if a bride decides not to marry she is put to her own death and if not she will surely know the shame she has put on her family.
In a way, don’t we all do this by having the groom ask for the daughter’s hand in marriage? I know my own husband asked for my father’s permission before we got married. Does your family have any traditional ways of doing a marriage; other cultures have done this for years, it is their traditions.
Believe it or not arranged marriages tend to last a lot longer than a marriage of love. One tends to believe that everything will be all polished and perfect for a marriage of love, however after that honeymoon stage the couple starts noticing things they never did. In an arranged marriage the couple knows they have faults and are waiting to discover what they are and how they will work around them.
In Indian there are several different arranged marriage that can be performed, one is old school, a modern one and then the western arranged marriage. The old school is more when the couple never gets to meet until their wedding day, which makes it kind of hard to like or dislike the person you are marrying. The modern arranged marriage is when history decided that the couple should at least meet a few times to see what each other are like. The western arranged marriage is probably the best out of the bunch, a group of women and men are lined up and they get to actually date and see how much they like each other and settle on one of the ones in the circle.
Long ago, arranged marriages were performed so that one kingdom could become one with another. Keep money in the family and grow stronger or conquer other countries and kingdoms. Arranged marriages could’ve been decided at the birth of the child, the moment he/she was born a name was decided and that was whom they’d end up marrying.
The UK is currently trying to pass a law so that arranged marriage cannot be done anymore. One issue is the age in which an arranged marriage is formed, the sponsor, also known as the spouse must be 18, while some believe that one of the spouses should be 21. The other issue is making not only the spouse but also the other partner to be at least 18 years of age before marriage. This way no one is marrying a girl/guy under 18.
An arranged marriage may only work if both parties are willing, while not every country recognizes this it does have a lot of history to back it. Of course I still prefer to pick my own man that I want to spend the rest of my life with, no arranged marriage for me.
Common Law Marriage
Many Americans believe that if they are together for a specific length of time, like seven years, that they are engaged in a common law marriage. That is an old myth that is “busted.” While some states do recognize common law marriage, they are few and their restrictions are stringent.
Research has found that couples that practice common law marriage are up to three times more likely to suffer a divorce than traditional marriage types unless you have premarital education and participate in common law marriage with the first and only person you live with.
Because the laws of all states that recognize common law marriage require death or formal divorce to dissolve a common law marriage, you are not skirting your obligations or the gravity of commitment by foregoing a formal wedding.
All states that provide for common law marriage require that both parties be of majority age, 18 years old. Common law marriage requirements are listed below for all states that recognize such a union:
Alabama – mental capacity to enter into agreement; agree to be married and consummation of the relationship
Colorado – present yourself as married and cohabitate
Iowa – intend to be and stay married, continuous cohabitation and public declaration of marriage
Kansas – mental capacity and legal ability to marry, agree to marry and publicly represent that you are married
Montana – capacity to consent, agree to marry, cohabitate and have a reputation of being married
Oklahoma – competency, agree to marry and cohabitate
Pennsylvania – verbal exchange of agreement to marry and a plan to stay married
Rhode Island – serious intent to stay married and conduct of a married couple
South Carolina – represent yourself as a married couple
Texas – signed form at their local county clerk’s office, agree to marry, cohabitate and behave as husband and wife
Utah – capable of giving consent and a reputation of being married
Washington, D.C. – cohabitate and express intent to be husband and wife
There are a few ways you can represent yourself as a married couple. The first is to tell the community you are married. The second is to use the same last name. The third is to file joint income tax returns and the fourth is to share in financial obligations (mortgage, lease, car loan, utilities, etc.)
Georgia used to grant common law marital status but discontinued this on January 1, 1997. If you met the state requirements prior to that date and have been involved in the same relationship continuously, your relationship is still recognized as a common law marriage.
The same is true in Idaho, though they stopped the practice of granting common law marital status on January 1, 1996. Ohio also discontinued their common law marriage laws on October 10, 1991. Pennsylvania stopped granting common law marriage status on January 1, 2005.
A common law marriage must be dissolved as any other marriage – by divorce or death. There is no “common law divorce”; simply leaving the relationship does not diminish your responsibility to your common law husband or wife.
If you intend to live with someone as a married couple but do not wish to enter into a common law marriage, you should each sign an agreement stating that you are each free, independent entities and do not wish to marry or become committed in the eyes of the law.
The United States Constitution requires that all states recognize marriages that are legal in another state. That means that you are free to move to a “non-common law marriage state” from a state which you have established this commitment. Please note, however, that the rights of married couples do vary from state to state.
Marriage Laws
Marriage laws vary from state to state and sometimes even county to county within a state. Marriage laws can restrict the age of the man, woman or both; require vaccinations or proof of immunity from certain diseases; require blood tests or physical exams; prove an unmarried status; allow same sex marriages or unions and even set a mandatory waiting period.
All states and counties require identification in the form of a valid driver’s license or photo ID (including Armed Forces identification or passport) and usually a secondary ID, like a social security number. Some of these requirements are listed below, by state. As laws change periodically, it is best to check with the county clerk in the county you are planning to marry for up to date regulations.
Alabama marriage laws require that persons under 16 years old may not be married, those between 16 and 18 may marry with consent of both parents or guardian(s) and a $200 bond. Residency in the state is not required. Also, a waiting period of 60 days after divorce is the only time restriction. There are no medical or blood tests required before marriage in Alabama. A marriage license costs between $42 and $70, depending on the county and package you choose. Cousins may marry and Alabama does allow for common law marriage. Alabama does not permit same sex marriages. A license is valid for 30 days. Alabama Department of Public Health can be reached at 334-613-5300.
California requires photo identification but you do not have to live in the state to apply for marriage there. Under the age of 18, at least one parent or guardian is required to appear. If either party has been married in the past, proof of dissolution of marriage is required. There is no waiting period in California and no blood or physical tests are required. Cousins may marry. California marriage laws do not permit for common law marriages but do allow for proxy marriages (only for armed forces members) and same sex domestic partnerships in San Francisco and Marin counties. A California marriage license is valid for 90 days. Contact the clerk of the county you wish to marry.
The District of Columbia marriage laws do not require that you live or work in DC. There is no waiting period post-divorce, but proof, either in the form of a certified death certificate or certified divorce decree is. You will need a blood test for syphilis, performed within thirty days prior to applying for a license by a physician, hospital, clinic or military lab. A mandatory waiting period is five days in the District of Columbia. Marriage laws to permit for common law and cousin marriages but not for same sex or proxy weddings. Persons between 16 and 18 years old are required to have signed parental or guardian consent. Contact the DC offices at 202-442-9009.
Massachusetts’s marriage laws have, in recent years, come to the forefront of politics. In 2004, the state began permitting same sex marriages. While there are legal challenges to this law, as of the time of this article same sex partners are permitted to marry, though their status is not recognized throughout most of the United States. There is a three-day waiting period for all couples. This waiting period can be waived in the event of one party being close to death or during the end of the bride-to-be’s pregnancy. No physical or blood tests required. Cousins may marry. Minors under 18 are required to obtain a court order before they can apply for a marriage license. You can reach the Massachusetts Department of Vital Statistics at (617) 740-2600.
Nevada may be the home of the drive-thru wedding chapel but their marriage laws are very similar to other states. A parent or legal guardian must be present or notarized permission is required for minors 16 or 17 years old. There is no waiting period and proof of dissolution of any previous marriage is not required. Unlike many other states, marriage laws of Nevada provide that non nearer of kin than second cousins or cousins of half blood may marry.
Marriage Ceremonies
A marriage ceremony used to be purely religious but contemporary, more secular ceremonies have become very popular over the last century. No matter which type of marriage ceremony you choose, the processional is the first glance the wedding guests get at the wedding party. You only get one shot at first impressions, so consider all options you have available.
A Catholic wedding processional begins with the priest followed by the groom and best man that enter through a side door. They wait at the altar for the groomsmen and bridesmaids that enter in pairs. The two that stand furthest from the groom and bride are the first to enter. The maid of honor enters alone, followed by the flower girl and ring bearer. Finally, the father (or other close family member) and the bride enter, arm in arm. The bride walks on the left and the father or escort leads her to the front of the aisles, taking his place next to the mother of the bride.
A Protestant wedding is similar with a few twists. The mothers of both the bride and the groom are seated after all other guests have taken their seats, usually escorted by a male family member, friend of the groom or other usher. The processional music starts right after the mothers have been seated. The officiator, groom and best man usually enter by a side door or entry and take their places at the altar. The groomsmen either escort the bridesmaids or follow the groom and best man through the side door. The bridesmaids, ring bearer, flower girl and maid or matron of honor then enter. The bride, escorted by her father or other close male relative, makes her way to the altar. The escort stays standing until the minister asks “who gives this woman in marriage” and he answers.
For Jewish marriage ceremonies, the processional is different still. The Rabbi and/or Cantor enter, followed by the grandparents of the bride, escorted by a male family member. The grandparents of the groom are escorted to the front row as well. The groomsmen then enter, walking in pairs. The best man is next to enter, followed by the groom, escorted by his parents. The bridesmaids enter, followed by the maid or matron of honor. Next come the ring bearer and/or flower girl and finally, the bride, escorted by her mother and father.
Informal weddings or those with a small wedding party may opt to choose a single file processional or none at all. A non-traditional ceremony may include a dog as the ring bearer, a cat as the flower girl and their masters (bride and groom) taking their places before them at the altar.
Marriage ceremonies, after the processional is complete, often start with a welcoming preamble by the officiator. An opening prayer of some sort, essentially a blessing or invocation to the day and the ceremony, usually follows the preamble. The guests are welcomed if they weren’t in the preamble. The vows are next, which may be lengthy or short. This is usually when the bride and groom promise to commit to one another. The rings or gifts are exchanged next.
If the bride and groom have elected to have a unity ceremony, they often take place after the rings or gifts have been elected. One popular unity ceremony asks that the man and woman light a single candle with separate flames. Jewish marriage ceremonies call for breaking a glass by the man and woman in unison.
After any unity ceremony has been completed, the couple is usually pronounced as husband and wife and they enjoy their first kiss as a married couple. Most marriage ceremonies are then followed by a recessional and reception to celebrate the marriage.
All About Traditional Wedding Vows
By definition, a vow is a “solemn promise”. Traditional wedding vows, then are the set of solemn promises that each member of a married couple makes to the other on their wedding day. But what do the traditional wedding vows include? Please continue reading to find out more.
Non-Denominational Traditional Wedding Vows
The words that many of us are familiar with that start off a traditional wedding ceremony, being, “”Dearly beloved, we are gathered together here in the sight of God, and in the face of this congregation, to join together this Man and this Woman in holy matrimony” can be found in the Anglican Book of Common Prayer. This source of very traditional wedding vows dates back to 1662.
Some of the words spoken on a couple’s wedding day are very similar to the Christian wedding ceremony from the Medieval Period. The portion of the ceremony where the couple answers what is known as the “Question of Intention” falls within this category.
The Question of Intention is the portion of the ceremony where each person (the groom being asked first) is asked whether they take the other to be his or her lawful wedded husband or wife. The Question continues with each party to the marriage being asked whether they promise to love, comfort, honor, and keep the other for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health.
This is also the part of the ceremony where the couple are asked whether they will be faithful to each other so long as they both shall live. The traditional response is to say “I do”. The couple is then pronounced husband and wife.
In addition to the traditional wedding vows, a wedding ceremony generally includes either the giving of a ring to the bride or the exchange of rings by the couple. The ring or rings are blessed and then exchanged. It is during this part of the ceremony that the guests will hear the traditional wedding vow, “With this ring, I Thee wed”.
The tradition of the wedding ring is based on the idea that the wedding ring is the symbol of the love between the two people. The ring has no beginning and no end. In addition, they are a tangible symbol of the vows the couples have made to each other on their wedding day.
The Question of “Obey”
The traditional wedding vows for the groom include the phrase “to love and cherish” until parted by death. For women, the traditional wedding vows were slightly different and stated that the bride promised to “love, cherish, and obey” her husband.
This is now considered out of date by many people and so in most traditional wedding ceremonies, both the bride and groom make the same vows to each other, and the notion of the bride “obeying” her husband is abandoned.
One notable exception to this tradition was the Duchess of York. When Sarah Ferguson married Britain’s Prince Andrew, she chose to promise to obey her husband. This part of the marriage ceremony would seem to be part of an older tradition in which the husband became the new owner of any property or valuables owned by the bride before her marriage. He would also have sole custody of any children they would have in the event that the marriage broke down in the future.
The Civil Wedding Ceremony
In a civil wedding ceremony, the vows are similar but instead of being asked questions, each person makes statements for themselves. Each person promises to love and care for the other so long as they both shall live.
Making a Marriage Proposal Special
When you become engaged what everyone seems to want to know is how the “proposer” popped the question. Was the marriage proposal given in a traditional manner down on one knee, looking up in the shining surprised eyes of the bride to be? Or was it given as a spur of the moment gesture after a good night out? Was it delivered with romantic words either from the man’s heart, or remembered from a love poem? Or was it more of a slurred just audible whisper before the wine took over and he fell asleep on the sofa?
For the couple, the marriage proposal is the start of the wedding. It’s the catalyst that starts a chain of events, which will lead to one of the most stressful, yet treasured, days in a woman’s life. For this reason, if no other, it should be given a fitting setting – somewhere romantic, memorable, an intimate moment between two separate people about to embark on a life together.
When you first realize that you are dating the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, that’s the time to start planning the marriage proposal. Don’t rush this. Try to discover what your partner thinks about public proposals? Do they like them, or do they think that a marriage proposal should be something between the couple alone? Do you think that they would enjoy doing a once-in-a-lifetime experience that ended in the proposal, or would they perhaps enjoy a quiet romantic dinner that ended with a ring as sparkling as the wine on the table?
There are many ways to make a marriage proposal special, but some of them will take some forward planning. For instance, you could consider fulfilling a dream your partner has to swim with dolphins, and ask the question when you are both in the water with the graceful animals swimming around you. Alternatively, how about a hot air balloon ride over some beautiful scenery such as the Californian vineyards or even an African savannah if you want to go really exotic! You could propose to your beloved underwater on a snorkeling trip, or at the top of a mountain covered in either spring flowers or snow. You could do it yourself, or you could organize for someone else – such as a look-alike celebrity or local personality – to do it on your behalf. You could give your marriage proposal at the end of a long monologue, or you could just place the ring somewhere she’ll find it at a nice dinner in an expensive restaurant and explain yourself when she finds it.
Memorable Marriage Proposal Ideas
Your marriage proposal will be a memory that will be with you and your spouse forever. Your significant other will be telling the tale of your proposal for years to come at family gatherings and parties. When gathering marriage proposal ideas, you want to make sure that your proposal is memorable and one that she will want to share proudly with everyone. If you cannot think of a great way to propose, try one of these marriage proposal ideas.
Go Back to the Place of Origin
When thinking of marriage proposal ideas, men often think about the place of the first date. This is a great, romantic place to propose. If the first date spot is not available, other firsts can take its place. The place where you first met your partner is also a great proposal spot. If you want to add a little bit of romance, take your significant other to the place of your first kiss. You may also impress her that you remember the exact place of such an event, and reenacting the kiss can prove to be extremely romantic.
Your spouse’s friends will be jealous of such a romantic proposal story!
Go Somewhere New
If you cannot think of any marriage proposal ideas at places that mean something to your relationship, start a new memory by selecting a romantic new place. Find somewhere beautiful and memorable that sets the perfect backdrop for your proposal. In the future, you can return to the place to reminisce of the day you decided to get married.
Propose in a Restaurant
Restaurants top the list of many marriage proposal ideas. If you think your significant other would like to be proposed to in a public place, a restaurant is a great choice. Expect many words of congratulations from restaurant staff and fellow diners. Future wedding anniversaries can be celebrated at the same restaurant, where you can reminisce about your proposal. Restaurant staff is usually very helpful in orchestrating the perfect proposal. Talk to them when you make your reservation to ensure that you get their most romantic, secluded table. You can produce the ring yourself, or get creative and have the ring served to your future spouse. If you want to get sneaky, you might be able to have the restaurant staff hide the ring in your partner’s food. Desserts are a traditional hiding spot for engagement rings; Just make sure she does not swallow it!
Large Public Events
This one may seem a bit cliché, and will not top everyone’s list of marriage proposal ideas. If your significant other loves drama and being the center of attention, ask her to marry you on the jumbo screen of a concert, sporting event, or other large public event. Contact event staff well in advance to inquire about available options. Make sure you feel out your significant other before performing such a proposal to make sure it will be received positively. Of course, before taking on one of these marriage proposal ideas, make sure you are confident that she will say yes! It could be devastating to you ego to get rejected in such a grand manner.
Be Spontaneous
Perhaps the best of the marriage proposal ideas is to simply be spontaneous. Carry the ring with you and wait for that moment that just seems right. You may be having dinner, or simply walking down the street. Many marriage proposal ideas may sound more memorable or eventful, but you do not need a grand event or a perfect setting to propose to the one that you love. She will remember the moment regardless. When the moment strikes you as right, just ask!
Where to Find Great Marriage Gifts
Finding the perfect marriage gift for the newlywed couple isn’t difficult, but it can take some research and creativity to find a great marriage gift. From picture frames, wine glass sets, commemorative plates and dishes, to larger gifts such as furniture or vacations, opportunities abound for finding the ideal present. Gift registries are an easy way to get started in finding the great marriage gift, and even if the couple hasn’t registered at your favorite store, you can still find plenty of ideas.
From glasses to photo frames, there are many luxurious and eye-catching items available. Think about getting an engraved set of champagne glasses with the couple’s name on it, or a hand-embroidered decorative pillow. Many craft stores can offer customized products and accessories that can have a stronger meaning. Offering a signature gift with a favorite photo attached is a wonderful way to highlight the special day. Another unique romantic gift is personalized wine, where a couple’s name and marriage date can be printed right on the label!
Other marriage gifts might include a crystal bouquet or crystal accessories to furnish the newlywed’s home. Family tree platters that show the joining of two families are a great way to offer a personalized accessory. A custom oil painting of the couple can really dress up a new living room, and contacted local artists or photo companies in the area can crate these.
Personalized books and photo frames are also great marriage gifts that will be remembered for a lifetime. These can capture those perfect moments to be cherished over time. Making a wedding scrapbook is also an attractive gift, a chance to highlight the important moments in the couple’s life. You can decorate it with some personalized details, or provide them with a kit to make their own.
A wedding quilt will be remembered and cherished forever, and can be handmade or bought tin the local crafts store. Wedding quilts can include romantic quotes, sayings, and the name of the couple with the wedding date. They can be luxurious or simple, but the effect will be the same.
Money is a n easy gift, but can really help out a newlywed couple. Money can be used for future honeymoon plans, help to build a savings account, or help with other needs during the couple’s newlywed status. Giving money in a creative form, in a special card or gift box, works we as a great marriage gift. If you book a travel package for the couple, make sure they have an option to adjust the schedule or itinerary if they need to. Vacations are a great gift, especially if they can be used any time of year.
Online resources abound for great wedding gifts. Try Macy’s Bloomingdales, and the site IfTheGiftFits.com for some great ideas on how to share your blessings for the happy couple. Furniture items, although expensive, can offer many benefits for the couple over the long term. These can include china and crockery items, vases, and even leather furniture for the living room. As long as you’re comfortable with the couple’s taste, giving them a decorative lamp or painting might work well as a great wedding gift.
Which Marriage Advice Should You Listen to?
When it comes to marriage advice, it seems everyone has an opinion. It doesn’t seem to matter how much people know about your relationship, how little they know about the circumstances surrounding the issue you are having with your partner, everyone you know – and even strangers who just happen overhear you discussing the problem – will tell you exactly what you should do. The problem is, they are issuing this marriage advice but only know half the story.
Within any marriage there is a history. It’s the history that develops over time when you live with someone. Perhaps your partner is saying that he doesn’t want to go to the dinner party your great aunt is holding – and your friends will tell you that they always thought he was unsociable, that he’s being unreasonable, that men just don’t get the family thing and so on. Don’t listen to marriage advice like this because the people giving it only know about this dinner party – they don’t know about the other events your family has had that he’s attended, they don’t know that he has a prior engagement for the same night that you agreed to weeks before, or that your great aunt refuses to talk to him on account of the fact she overheard him tell someone years ago that he thought she boiled her vegetables to extinction. These things are part of a marriage. But people who don’t live inside a married couple’s home don’t usually know these little gems of family history, and so the person giving the marriage advice is giving it without being in full possession of the facts.
Marriage advice is rarely given impartially. This means that there is always a bias towards one side. The woman’s friends and family will generally support her regardless if she’s right or wrong. The man’s friends and family will do the same. What’s worse is that rather than sticking to the situation currently being disputed by the couple, both sides will dig up all the other grievances against the other side that they can remember – so adding fuel to the fire. This is why many couples with more serious issues than a dinner party ends up going to a marriage guidance professional who is not only trained, but more importantly in the marriage advice field, is unknown to either side!
As sappy as it sounds, the best marriage advice that anyone can give you is to listen to your heart. The person you have the problem with is your life partner, not just someone who may be transient in your life. Is this really something worth upsetting the person you love about? Is it something that you can’t reach a compromise with? Isn’t it possible that you are being just a tiny bit unreasonable?
Which leads to the next best piece of marriage advice – and that is to look first to your own actions before you start assigning the role of the unreasonable party to your partner. It’s easy to take a partner’s opinion for granted. Of course he wants to go to great aunt’s dinner party (despite the fact she won’t speak to him) because he goes to all your family functions – of course he’ll cancel the other engagement he had. But think about it? In view of the fact that he usually goes, is it reasonable to demand he goes on this occasion? Or would a marriage advice expert tell you that in terms of equality within a marriage, sometimes you have to accept that your requests are unreasonable and you need to remember that marriage is an equal relationship where occasionally your partner is allowed to go and do his (or her) own thing if they choose.
Is a Las Vegas Marriage for You?
It’s talked about in such a tone of voice that a Las Vegas marriage is almost a cliché. Is it really legal to get married on what could be called – and some actually admit to being – a whim? What makes getting married in Las Vegas so popular? Why do so many couples choose to make it the place for their big day (or night as the case may be in Vegas)?
There are two very different opinions on Las Vegas as a wedding venue. Some people feel that a Las Vegas marriage is something that should avoided like all-in-one tight white suits. Then there are others who see the city as a place to have a wedding that’s unlike anything they’d probably envisaged their own ceremony to be. There are couples who arrive in the city with a Las Vegas marriage their main focus. Then there are others for whom a good night at the tables means a gold band to place beside the extra chips on the hotel dresser.
It’s not possible to just arrive in Vegas and expect to get married however. Even in this fun-filled city, there are formalities that have to be observed. Be prepared to wait in line (on some days a LONG line) for your marriage license for example – without this not even the drive-thru wedding chapel is going to marry you! If you check in advance what you need, and have your paperwork in order, then the processing takes only as long as the line of couples ahead of you take to move along. Once you hold the license you are free to choose the location of your choice – and if you want a Las Vegas marriage, you’ve got plenty of choice!
Many people come to Vegas for a Las Vegas marriage for one thing – Elvis! Memphis may have been Elvis’ home, but Vegas is home to Elvis – or rather his impersonators! For those who have a thing for the King, then Vegas is a must for the perfect wedding. Whether you want to be married by “him”, witness your ceremony, or serenade you as your read your vows, you’ll be able to find a venue that will provide exactly the kind of Elvis wedding you want.
If you and your partner are staying at one of the hotels on the strip, ask at the front desk if you aren’t sure about what your options for venue are. Some of the hotels even have an in-house wedding planner available who can help you find the wedding of your dreams in Vegas. They will be able to advise you on everything from where to find a dress if you haven’t brought one with you, to getting some photographs, and tracking down the perfect venue for your ceremony.
Even without a wedding planner, a Las Vegas wedding is fairly simple to arrange however. With some of the venues open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, there’s usually some time available for a reservation at the venue of your choosing. Talks to the owners of the venue, most of them offer a variety of packages that range from tacky to tasteful with everything in between. Whether you want the whole nine yards of flowers, photos, video, and specially created vows along with your ceremony – or whether you prefer to just complete the legalities and leave – you’ll have no trouble finding what you desire.
Love them or hate them, a Las Vegas wedding is something of an enigma. Initial marriage, special anniversary, or just a blessing in a hotel lobby surrounded by Centurions, Vegas does them all – and what better place could there be to take the biggest gamble of them all, marriage!
Love and Marriage – Do They Really Go Together Today?
The old song of love and marriage going together like a horse and carriage may be cute, but does it really mean anything in today’s society? Do you really need to have love in a relationship in order to marry, and do you need to marry if you love someone?
Only one generation back, our so-called civilized culture declared that love and marriage inevitably followed one another. There were no co-habiting/common-law relationships socially acceptable. The “Cleaver” idea of family and home firmly put love and marriage together in a rose-tinted cameo of how a happy life ought to be. But only a generation or two down and life is very different. Attitudes have relaxed. Social norms have changed. Love and marriage don’t have to go together – and with the more open society we live in accepting that we are free to love who we choose and not be restricted by gender, then in some cases it isn’t even legally possible for them to do so. With homosexual marriage being a political and legal hot potato around the world, love and marriage is even possible for gay couples in some areas, whilst in others it’s still illegal and so love and marriage in the traditional sense is denied.
As the world becomes a smaller place and people increasingly move around from country to country, the diversity of cultures doesn’t necessarily mean that mixed marriages are always the way things go for a minority group in any country. Arranged marriages are still a strong part of many cultures where the parents of a child being raised in a country other than the one of their parents’ birth is legally bound to marry someone of their parents’ choosing – often still residing in the homeland. For these children, love and marriage is something that they can only dream and hope for, not something that is theirs by right.
Along a similar line to arranged marriages there are a number of people who take it upon themselves to facilitate the legal immigration of a person from outside a country by offering themselves for marriage. Love and marriage doesn’t come into this situation at all – usually it’s nothing more than a cold financial deal between two adults who are attempting to beat the system. For these people, marriage does not equate to love, and the problem with this kind of marriage is that it’s so commonplace that it overshadows and dominates how officialdom treats all couples who are trying to move to one country or the other in order to be together. For those genuine couples it is the thought of love and marriage that makes them want to give up all that they are familiar with in order to have a “traditional” life of marriage with the person they’ve fallen in love with. The problem is that because of the false marriage applications, the genuine couples are made to jump through immigration hoops before their dreams of love and marriage and happy ever after can take place.
Morally, there is still a feeling that love and marriage is the right way to go and so there are couples who marry just to please their parents even though they feel that they have a strong enough bond as a couple without a marriage certificate and a couple of gold bands to prove it. However, despite the fact we live in a society and culture where love and marriage is not socially necessary anymore, there are still some people who prefer to make this commitment to the person they want to spend the rest of their life with, and for many, love and marriage remain firmly together and as much a part of the fairytale as the happy ever after ending the couple hopes for.
How to Find Happiness in a Marriage
It is very important to find both present moment happiness and joy about the future. Happiness is the fuel for a meaningful life without it we cannot seem to get off the ground. How to find happiness in a marriage is not always an easy solution you have to work for it. You must focus on the things that you have in order to find happiness in your marriage.
Most folks like to dwell on the things that they do not have and even pine over them. This plainly put in the Bible by Jesus; states do not covet your neighbor’s wife, nor his house, fields, money, anything that is not yours do not covet. This may seem like a simple commandment to follow but in some people, it is rather difficult. You see they have not found happiness in their own life so therefore they do not know how to find happiness in a marriage.
How to find happiness in a marriage stems from the factor that you already have found happiness in your own life. In ordinary times, people know what they are blessed with. Others, who just simply crave what ever they see and want it badly usually, are never happy for their worldly possessions cannot fill the empty void inside of them.
How to find happiness in a marriage begins with everybody finding happiness with God. God will help you through your mood swings and lift you up helping you to forget worries. Happiness is the normal state of humanity. Look at a baby and watch it smile. The baby does not want anything in return, it is truly happy. For the next three days spend time looking for your moments of happiness. Each moment in your life kept filled with pleasure will help you to keep happiness in your marriage. Please count the moments of happiness that you have felt. Then think about some of the material things, are they put away or gone? The material things seemingly just disappear while moments of happiness linger with us forever.
How to find happiness in a marriage is by your attitude. True happiness is an attitude of noticing the good constantly coming our way. You will find that there is so much good coming every minute, there is no need to hand onto the past. We need to grasp onto a rope to keep ourselves from drowning even on dry land. The trick to finding happiness in our own lives and that of our marriage is to get into the habit of looking for good things, instead of griping all day about everything that has gone wrong. Joy gives us a feeling of power and energy. Joy means being excited about now and about the future. I always believed to find really JOY in your life that you need to follow these simple basic rules. First, you need to put Jesus first in your life, Others next in your life, and then yourself, last! That has always been my recipe for a happier more joyful life and marriage with my husband.
How to Help Kids with Your Second Marriage
A second marriage can be an exciting time, a period of lots of change and new roles and responsibilities. When kids are involved, it’s important for couples to take the time to learn about their needs and how the changes may be affecting them. Kids will slowly adjust to the changes, but they sometimes need assurance and encouragement to understand what is going on. Especially if the kids are young, they may have difficulty accepting what is going on with their new family.
If there was significant discord in the first marriage, it might be difficult for kids to adjust successfully with the changes. A second marriage may feel confusing, and if there are new siblings to become acquainted with, this can be especially difficult. Paying attention to every kids’ needs and concerns is important, and it may help to work with a counselor to sort through difficult issues.
If the second marriage involves new parenting roles, time and patience will be required so that the kids can be comfortable being themselves. Conflicts from the first marriage may be too close to their memory, or they may not get along with other new family members. It’s essential that conflicts are resolved easily and effectively. Talking things out, holding family meetings, resolving each issue as it arises, and just listening can all help.
Sometimes kids view a second marriage as shameful, and might withdraw or overreact to situations without any direct cause. If they are still in touch with the parent from the first marriage, it’s important to make sure they are developing a healthy relationship and growing positively with either parents or families. It can be hard to share views and perspectives if the first marriage parents are still not on good terms. Again, listening, positive encouragement and strong lines of communication are essential for healthy growth.
If kids are having difficulties with social relationships, schoolwork, after-school activities, or anything seems out of balance, it’s important for both parents to understand the changes taking place. Working with guidance counselors may help if the kids are having difficulty relating to people. If they are not comfortable around adults, this can be a cause for concern. Sibling rivalry can also cause daily disruptions, and all arguments and matters need to be resolved maturely and sensibly. Making sure the kids have a healthy home environment to grow and play in is vital. They need to feel secure when everything else around them feels so new and different.
Second marriages can and do succeed, despite any setbacks the previous marriage or marriages may have encountered. When kids are involved, there are many positive ways to help them and let them grow. Kids can learn new skills, find out better ways of communicating with all parents involved, and develop strong bonds and ties. It’s important that they feel safe and secure so that they can make strong decisions throughout the process. A second marriage can bring a lot of positive things, and help everyone lead a happy, healthy, and productive life with the right perspective.
Marriage Tips for Long Term Success
Marriage is an institution as old as Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden. Many of us have worked very hard to keep our marriage and our families together in harmony. I really like the old adage “Marriage is made in heaven, but so is thunder and lightning.” That sums up how a marriage can go but with careful consideration and communication, your marriage can remain for a long time. I would like to share some marriage tips for long-term success.
In my research studies, I found the following marriage tips for long-term success that other married couples shared.
Intimacy in a marriage is very important both sexually and emotionally, that is why you should continue to build on intimacy in your marriage.
Create passion for life and for one another being passionate in your life and with your mate helps your marriage to keep growing.
Marriage is a commitment that you should celebrate with each other.
Your mate is your lifetime friend. In order for someone to become your friend, you need to like them. Learn to like each other for there many things that please you.
Learn how to have fun with each other laugh together and use humor in healthy ways.
It is always important to comfort, encourage, and affirm one another.
When you are, a married couple learns to be independent stand on your own two feet as a couple and not be dependent either financially or emotionally on either of your parents.
Privacy and space is all important so respect one another in that manner.
It is important when the children come that you parent together for your children and your marriage.
You should deal with crisis and adversity together as one. When you fight or quarrel do it fairly.
One of the best marriage tips for a long-term success in your marriage is to accept each other’s differences and do not try to change your spouse.
Keep romance alive in your marriage think of things to do that will please your spouse.
The above marriage tips for long-term success are important but I believe that intimacy is one of the most important parts of a good marriage. Intimacy is more than just sex. Our psychological, spiritual, and physical makeup cries out for intimacy with one another. The reason we have this feeling is that God designed marriage to be the most intimate of all human relationships, in which we share life intellectually, socially, emotionally, spiritually, and physically.
In continuing with our marriage tips for long-term success, we have broken intimacy down into five important aspects of our lives. The first one is Intellectual intimacy. Intellectual intimacy is not about discussing highly intellectual ideas but just simple thoughts about food, finances, health, crime, work, politics all the things that are affecting your lives.
Much of our lives involve doing social intimacy that is spending time around events in our lives together or experiencing events separately but sharing through open communication. Our feelings are spontaneous, emotional responses to what we encounter through the five senses. We should share our emotions and we build emotional intimacy. Spiritual intimacy does not require agreement of belief on every detail. We are seeking to tell each other what is going on with our inner self. The purpose is not agreement, but understanding. Our final marriage tip for long-term success is the physical intimacy. We should strive to grow closer together, not to eliminate the “otherness” but to enjoy it as one.
How to Save Your Marriage
Many marriages fail because of a lack of communication, a rocky foundation of trust, the inability to spend quality time together, and countless other reasons. In spite of everything, there are ways to help save a marriage that is heading toward negativity. A healthy marriage is comprised of mutual understanding, listening and respecting each other’s differences, accepting arrangements and plans, and overall, having the confidence to work through setbacks and conflict.
It’s important not to blame each other for any conflict, tense situations, or let anger rise out of proportion on a regular basis. In order to save your marriage, it’s going to take time to understand and listen to each other and come to a resolution rather than a crisis. Talking together in s peaceful and safe environment is essential for progress.
Making time for each other consistently is also important in saving your marriage. If you don’t have time for dinner, schedule time for coffee, breakfast, or even doing an activity together where you’ll both have plenty of room to talk, share, and laugh about what’s on your mind. Take a time out from voice mails, e-mails, and switch off the television. A marriage requires a personal commitment just like other responsibilities.
Plan a trip together, or take a mini vacation where you can remember your commitment to one another. This can help re-amplify your marriage, creating the opportunity to rekindle some romance and the positive moments and times you’ve shared together. Remembering your commitment to one another can be a turning point in saving your marriage, a time to honor and cherish.
Remind each other that you’ll get through the rough times, the crisis, or whatever is on your mind together. This can help create a stronger bond, and serve as a stepping stone for the next phase of your life. Ask for support from family and friends if you need to, or make arrangements with a marriage counselor to overcome the difficulty together. Sometimes it helps to have a third party involved so that conflict can be managed effectively with another perspective.
Learning how to cope with stress during marital conflict is important when you want to save your marriage. This can mean taking a break, finding social support, or working directly on the problem together. You can show empathy and love, and avoid criticism. This can strengthen your bond, and also clear the way for deeper feelings for one another.
Having patience will be essential in saving your marriage, and it’s important to maintain balance and perspective if any conflict arises. Patience also involves listening to one another during an argument, and letting each other share views on a subject. Resolving marital conflict may not be easy, but it offers an opportunity for learning and growing. No matter how chaotic life can be, there can always be time to take a deep breath and let things settle. It’s important to be realistic, practice strong communication skills, further your commitment and understanding of one another, and be as patient as possible.
Previous article: How To Seduce Women Out Of Your League 2 – It Is Not About Sex