The Beginning Of How To Pick Up Women
All of your attempts at seduction have to have a beginning. There is always that first meeting, that first date, the first time you kiss, and the first time you have sex. All of it has a beginning.
But don’t get ahead of yourself. Start with that first meeting. It is how you present yourself to her that will make a difference. It isn’t somebody else’s “cookie cutters” that are going to make an impression on her. It is you, and only you, that will make a difference.
The Approach
There is always some anxiety when you approach a woman, even for the most “seasoned” seducer. You don’t know who she is yet, so there is that thought that she will not find your first impression a very good one. But how will you know if you never even say “hello?” There are times when your first impression is not always your best one. That’s alright. There are also times that you can salvage that first impression.
Most women know that there is always that nervous time when you first approach her. More than likely, she’s a bit nervous too. After all, she doesn’t know you, either. Your approach should be one that displays some confidence. Introduce yourself, but don’t put off a swagger that says you are “all that” to her. A lot of women are turned off by that. Instead, display the confidence that tells her that you know who you are and that you know not only what know what you want, but what she wants as well. One simple hello can become the relationship you want, if you play it right.
Start with a bit of small talk, first by introducing yourself. Then show an interest in who she is and what she does in her work and her hobbies. The point is to find some common ground that both of you enjoy. Once that common ground is found, the conversation and a relationship can be in the works for both of you.
The other thing is that if you ask her out anywhere, make sure it is in a place she is comfortable with, but where you can still carry on some great conversation. Quite often, your local coffee shop or restaurant will do. Other times, it might be a quiet walk through a public park. The point is that both of you have to comfortable in the surroundings. Even a local carnival can be a fun “first date,” as long as the comfort level is casual for both of you. Casual, in this sense, means that the conversation and the actions on the date are natural, without any “stiffness” on either side. If you’re not comfortable with the surroundings, she won’t be either. On the reverse, if she isn’t comfortable it will affect you, too.
In the art of seduction, you have to find that common point of contact that both of you enjoy. You can try new things at a later time, but your approach is not the time to ask her to do that.
The Science of Seduction And Pickup Women
You have undoubtedly heard people talk about “chemistry” in a relationship. But there are some of them that don’t know the real chemistry behind seduction. The human body is amazing if you study it a bit. It can be rather complicated, but there are times when all you need to know is the basics.
The body secretes different hormones at different times in both males and females. It’s common knowledge that women have more hormones than men do. They’re necessary for reproduction. If you paid attention in your health class in school, you have a basic idea of how those hormones come into play.
But here is something a lot of people are not aware of: the human body secretes pheromones as a means of attracting a mate or in being territorial. Believe it or not, attraction is more than how you look or what you do. It’s also the fact that testosterone and pheromones come into play in your seduction. Although you can’t consciously control their release, it’s a good fact to keep in mind. There are times when you end up attracting the wrong woman for you. If that ever happens, you will know why. You can blame it on your pheromones and testosterone.
Human nature is another part of the science of seduction. A lot of women like to “play hard to get.” This isn’t something that they always do consciously, although some do. But it is part of human nature to resist what someone else wants them to do. The art of seduction is how you can get past that barrier.
It’s also human nature to be attracted to someone that appears to be similar to you. For example, a geek is attracted to a geek, and a god is attracted to a goddess. But there are times when that isn’t always true. Sometimes a city guy will be attracted to a country woman and country man might be attracted to a city women. That combination can go a few ways. That is the law of opposites. (You have probably heard it said many times that opposites attract.) Just like the positive and negative ions in a magnet, those people find compatibility.
A Plan That Isn’t a Plan
Now that you know a bit of the science of seduction, let’s get back to the art of it. The problem that some men have with seduction is that they build a rehearsed plan to approach women. But there are a lot of women that will simply roll their eyes at you and walk away when you use those “canned” pick up lines. There are some of them that are flattering, but if they still have that canned sound to them, they won’t work. For example, “If beauty were sunlight, you would shine from a million light-years away.” Although it’s flattering, a woman may chuckle at it and move on.
The idea here is that seduction is not a “plan.” Although it’s a good idea to study up on it a bit, there is no set way to seduce a woman. It’s been mentioned before, but bears repeating again: every woman is different. One technique may work for one woman, while you could get turned down flat by another one.
There are times that a funny or cheesy pick up line will work, simply because it can break the ice. If the woman you approach is open to seduction in the first place, she will want to learn more about you. “Aside from being sexy, what do you do for a living?” Sometimes that’s all it takes to get a conversation going.
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How To Pickup Women: The Conversation
Once you introduce yourself, don’t just stand there in silence and expect that she will continue a conversation. You have to be able to converse with her in a way that lets you learn more about her. It goes without saying that she also will want to know something about you. However, the type of conversation you have may depend on where you meet. Sometimes clubs have music that is too loud for you to hear each other very well, and other locations may have distractions that interrupt your conversation on a regular basis.
Start your conversation in a general way. (Her name and nickname are probably the best place to start.) Depending on where you are, you could find a table where you can be seated together in order to be more comfortable. If you are at the club, sometimes simply asking her to dance can be an ice-breaker. More than likely, if you ask her for her name during or after the dance, she will give it to you. There is even a pretty good chance that she will want to pursue a conversation with you. Use that time to get to know a bit about her, and to possibly to get an edge in getting an official date with her.
Questions and Answers When Try To Pickup Women
Once you have that opportunity for conversation, there are some questions that you can ask and some that you really shouldn’t. Given the fact that you just met her, some questions may seem to be prying into her personal life before you have been given the right to.
For example, you have heard that “a proper lady never tells her age.” That is a falsehood in today’s world. But that isn’t one of the first questions you should ask. Instead, make a game out of it. Try guessing her age, but be careful with that one. Always make a guess on the low end of the spectrum. The thing is that you have to be sure you are not dealing with a “girl” is that under-aged. If you’re quite confident that you aren’t, then guessing her age at twenty-one isn’t so far-fetched, given your age and her appearance.
You will also find in conversation the fact that women are proud of their accomplishments. More than likely, she will tell you what she does for a living, or her degrees earned in college. No matter what it is that she does, compliment her on her efforts. The lead-in to that conversation is to ask her if she works or goes to school. Otherwise, you might offend her if she is actually not working at the time.
Until you get to know her better, never ask about children or ex’s unless she brings up those subjects. To some women, they will feel it isn’t any of your business to know. Others will volunteer the information. But those are subjects that can be touchy, so tread lightly there.
If you can find a common hobby or interest between the two of you, ask her about it. There are times when she may be just as avid in those interests as you are and can give you some information that you can use later in your seduction. (Not as a con, but in being able to please her as well as enjoying her company.) There are also times when you can give her some pointers in the hobby or interest. For example, there are more and more women interested in different kinds of sports. If she is one of them, maybe your conversation can go in that direction for awhile. Those hobbies and interests can be your lead-in to getting that first date.
What to Reveal
Just as you would like to know some things about her, she will want to know some things about you as well. But there are some things that you should not reveal in that first meeting. Of course, she will want to know what you do for a living, too. Giving that information is usually one of the first topics that come up. But you should be aware that more than likely that information gives her a hint in what your yearly earnings are. But that’s alright. The point is that you should not go into specifics. A first meeting is not the time to say that you’re millionaire or that you won the lottery in a big way last year. There is no doubt that women are attracted to rich men for a very obvious reason.
Women like men that are confident and stable. If you can show her that you meet those qualifications, you have a “shoe in the door.” They also like men that show interest in them by making eye contact and asking them flattering questions, like “how do you do all that you do, and still find time for someone like me?” That question is suggestive of your consideration for her and her lifestyle, while also suggesting that there could be an on-going relationship between the two of you.
Women also like a bit of mystery. If you give away every facet of your life to her in the first meeting, you lose that edge. Keep the conversation more generalized. Women love the excitement of a new romance, in most cases. If there is still more she wants to know about you, she will stick around to get it.
The Closing
Since you probably have already found out some of the things that she likes to do, the closing shouldn’t be all that difficult. Ask her if you can call her for a date, or suggest one on the spot. For example, if you’re going to see one her favorite movies or watching one of her favorite sports teams on television, ask her to join you. A first date doesn’t have to cost you a fortune, nor does it have to imply that you have royal connections in some way. The thing is that you have to impress her with having the same interests that you have between you and that you want to include her.
If she suggests a double-dating situation, go for it. Remember, she has to be comfortable with you. Her having her friends as “buffers” does that for her. If things go well, she’ll ask them to go elsewhere, so she can spend more time with you. Of course, it goes without saying that you have to maintain that level of comfort. If she feels uncomfortable in anyway, especially in this day and age, she’ll bolt for the door and never come back. There is another caution due here: there are some women that take self-defense classes, and they aren’t afraid to use them against you if you take the wrong actions.
In other words, you want to seduce or pickup a woman, not just find her for sexual gratification. There are a lot of woman that will not allow that in their lives, and someone could get hurt. More than likely, it will be you, although she may suffer also. Don’t do that in the first place, if you have any common decency at all.
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