Jan 3, 2013 12:28 p.m. (CST) – Good day and Happy 2013 to you and Yours. www.stumptownconfidential.com – Home of Best Ways To Attract Women And Art Of Seduction, Key To Success In Life is pleased to introduce the new Financial Bible 2013 Edition featuring monthly updates on topics of financial lessons faq and financial planning tips. We hope you will find them useful and use them to put your financial house in order so you can concentrate on other important topics such as dating, the art Of seduction and so on.
Updated Feb 2nd, 2013 1:18 a.m. (CST) – Nine new Yellow Pages Of Finance articles featuring the following topics – The Truth About Being Laid Off and How to Thrive in Spite of It. Smart Strategies For Clarifying Workplace Expectations. Increase Your Success in All Areas of Life by Discovering Your Natural Talents. Fast-Track Your Career With Personal Branding. Raise Your Performance Level by Harnessing the Power of Social Facilitation. Prepare Your Mind for Prosperity: 10 Ways to Think Like a Winner. Stop Criticizing Yourself in 6 Steps. You Have the Power to Heal Your Shame and Want to Leave a Legacy? 8 Ways You Can Make a Lasting Difference.
Jan 2013 Yellow Pages Of Finance
Quick Way To Learn How To Handle Salary Discussions With Confidence
The most challenging part of a job interview for many candidates is the question of salary. Being able to discuss money matters with confidence will help you get the compensation you want and may even improve your job satisfaction. These are some steps to take before you get a job offer, after you get a job offer and in specific circumstances.
Steps to Take Before You Get a Job Offer
1. Postpone the discussion. It’s always best to let the employer go first in any salary discussion. Try to postpone discussing compensation until you receive a job offer. That way you have a better chance of staying in the running and negotiating with an employer who truly wants you on their team.
2. Assess your individual situation. The exact approach you take will depend on the situation. You may be required to fill out an application stating your salary expectations. In that case, try naming a range rather than a specific figure.
3. Stress your interest in the position. Let the people interviewing you know that you’re enthusiastic about their company and the position. Explain that monetary compensation is just one factor for you and that you’re also interested in career advancement, gratifying work and other considerations.
4. Conduct background research. Gather all the information you can about average salaries for the openings you’re looking at. Visit your local library or check online on websites such as Salary.com.
Steps to Take After You Get a Job Offer
1. Ask for clarification. Congratulations on receiving a job offer. Now is the time to discuss salary. It’s still advantageous if you can get the employer to take the first step and let you know the budget they’re working with.
2. Be honest about your salary history. Any salary information you provide can be verified, so tell the whole truth. You may be able to strengthen your position by citing other relevant benefits including bonuses and commission.
3. Evaluate the whole package. Remember that your salary is just one item in your entire compensation package. Pay attention to all the details including paid leave, health insurance and retirement accounts.
4. Negotiate in good faith. Aim for a win-win solution. To start off on a good relationship with your employer, you both want to feel that you were treated fairly.
5. Put it in writing. Ask for a written letter of agreement or cite everything you discuss in your thank you letter or email following up on the job offer. You want to be sure you’re on the same page.
Steps to Take in Special Circumstances
1. Juggle multiple offers skillfully. It’s common to use one offer to leverage a higher offer for the position you most prefer. Give each prospective employer a firm date for making your decision and decline graciously if you choose to work elsewhere.
2. Interview for lower paying positions. Go ahead and check out a position that sounds promising even if the stated pay is less than you need. You may be able to propose how you can be of extra value and wind up making you and your new boss very happy.
3. Consider taking a pay cut. There are times when your income is likely to decline. If you’re faced with a difficult economy or looking to change careers, a pay cut may make sense.
4. Work with a recruiter. One of the easiest ways to handle salary discussions is to work with a recruiter. They will usually manage much of the financial arrangements for you.
Show up for your next interview feeling ready and able to handle the question of compensation. There are many factors to consider when making a career move and money is one of the important issues we all need to be able to address.
Here Are Things Every Employee Needs To Know About Initial Probation Periods
When starting a new job, you may find yourself facing an initial probation period. In these hard economic times where there is stiff competition for jobs, more and more companies are instituting probation periods for newly hired employees.
Read on to discover the ins and outs of these probation periods and how you can take advantage of them to make a positive impression with your new employer.
Assessing the Situation
1. Clarify the purpose. The most common reason employers use probationary periods is to ensure that they’re satisfied with their hiring decision before making the arrangement permanent.
* Conduct some background research. What you find out may help you figure out if it’s a longstanding policy or a reaction to recent personnel issues.
2. Understand the terms. Some positions are advertised as temporary or part time with the potential to become permanent or full time. In other cases, the expectation may exist that any candidate will become a regular employee upon the successful completion of the probation period. Compensation packages including pay and benefits may be lower initially or they may be unaffected.
3. Learn the success rate. Ask around to see how things worked out for others in your same situation. It’s a good sign if all your coworkers started out in the same fashion and are now happy to be continuing in their jobs.
* If there’s a history of employees being terminated when their initial contract expires, you may want to exercise more caution.
Positioning Yourself to Succeed
1. Agree on the evaluation schedule and methods. It’s essential that you and your supervisor have a meeting of the minds on when and how you’ll be evaluated. Reach a consensus on goals and performance measures.
2. Read your job description. Precise and comprehensive job descriptions are a valuable asset. Review the list of responsibilities, the qualities needed, and the relationships between your position and the rest of the organization.
3. Ask for the training you need. Let your supervisor know if you need certain training to do your job. This may be a combination of internal and external programs.
4. Meet regularly with your supervisor. Frequent communication will help everyone stay on track. Informal feedback and routine check-ins give you an opportunity to make valuable contributions and resolve any conflicts promptly.
5. Reach out to your coworkers. A wise employer will consult an employee’s peers to gather pertinent information. Make a good impression by always being helpful and demonstrating a friendly attitude.
6. Know your boundaries. It’s natural to feel like you’re being tested. You may decide that it’s worthwhile to work longer hours and take on additional tasks if it improves you chances. Keep in mind, however, what you can reasonably sustain over the long haul.
Other Considerations
1. Get everything in writing. A letter of agreement protects both the employer and the employee. Read it carefully before you sign.
2. Check your health insurance. Some employers decline to provide health insurance for probationary employees. You may need to purchase your own policy for yourself and your family during this interval.
3. Rewrite your resume. What you put on your resume could depend on your individual circumstances. If you wind up doing short term contract work that fails to result in a permanent position, you may want to describe it accordingly.
4. Know the law. Employment terminology can be complex and have important legal implications. Check with your state labor department or a trusted professional if you have any questions. They can help explain such matters as the difference between contract workers and employees and your eligibility for severance and unemployment compensation.
Initial probation periods may pose an additional challenge when you’re starting a new job, but everything can still work out well. Analyze what you’re being offered to be sure it meets your needs. Then put in a great performance so you’ll ace your evaluation.
Learn Truly Profitable Work-At-Home Organization Strategies
Working at home comes with lots of benefits like wearing slippers all day and being your own boss, but it’s important to have an effective organization plan to make it profitable. These strategies for organizing your workday and environment will help you meet your goals.
Strategies for Organizing Your Workday
1. Set a starting time. Punctuality counts even when you report to yourself. Determine a realistic time when you can be ready to get down to business each morning.
2. Give yourself a quitting time. Hold onto your leisure and family time. It’s just as important to establish an end to your work day. In the long run, maintaining productivity usually means avoiding excessive overtime.
3. Leave room for breaks. Give yourself a chance to take a breather and socialize. Stay connected by arranging lots of lunch dates. Pause during the day for meals, exercise and rest.
4. Put your daily calendar in writing. Organize your tasks and meetings onto a daily calendar. It will help you to juggle your workload and take on the most challenging jobs at the time of day when you feel most alert.
5. Fill out a time sheet. There’s a good reason why many companies ask their employees to hand in their time sheets. You’ll be able to track how your time really gets spent.
6. Keep regular sleep hours. You might be tempted to stay up until all hours because there’s no morning commute ahead of you. In reality, you still need a full night’s sleep to be at your best.
7. Pay yourself back. Sick days and car repairs will sometimes interfere with your plans. Be flexible. You can always make the time up when things calm down.
8. Consider your individual needs. Depending on the nature of your business, you may be able to ignore the usual nine to five protocol. On the other hand, ensure you are still accessible to clients and colleagues during the hours when they need to reach you.
9. Evaluate yourself. Track how you’re doing. Give yourself a monthly review to identify any improvements that would be helpful.
Strategies for Organizing Your Environment
1. Designate a specific work area. Having a home office or at least some space devoted exclusively to business makes it easier to focus on professional activities. Once you pick your spot, the setting itself will help remind you to focus on your job.
2. Notify your family. Enlist the support of your whole household. Ask your spouse and kids to minimize interruptions. Let them know the best time to contact you on workdays. Post a reminder on your office door during conference calls or other times when you need to avoid disturbances.
3. Limit visitors and errands. You may also need to notify your neighbors that working at home still means you are working. It’s nice to be helpful and hospitable, but ensure your day remains manageable.
4. Get a partner. Many professionals who work at home find it helpful to link up with each other. You can schedule a daily call to discuss how things are going. Knowing that you’ll be giving even an informal report may provide the motivation you need to keep your mind on your accomplishments.
5. Call in expert help. If you need more help getting organized, there are plenty of resources. Browse online for forums geared to your situation or book a consultation with a professional organizer.
You can wear your pajamas and still be a professional. Develop a viable schedule for the work you do at home and stick to it. It’s a great way to enjoy your independence while you provide for yourself and your family.
Are You Feeling Overwhelmed? 7 Ways to Balance Work and Home
Most of our lives are filled with so much to do – family, work, home, and “me time.” When you’re at work, you find you’re thinking about what tasks need to get done at home. When you’re at home, you just can’t get that new work project off your mind.
Occasionally, you might even think you’re not capable of living the kind of life you want because there’s just so much to do. How can you manage it all?
Try these tips to balance work and home so you can experience the good life you deserve:
1. Admit you’re feeling at loose ends. When you can acknowledge there’s an issue, you can then go about fixing it. Plus, it gives you the chance to acknowledge that you want to make changes to feel more settled in your life.
2. Stick to your designated assigned hours at work. The one sure way to let your work and home lives collide into chaos is to work more hours than you should. Sure, you may have temporary periods of time where you have to put in 2 or 3 extra hours to finish up a project, but that should only happen on occasion.
* If you notice it’s becoming the norm to work 9 or 10 hours a day, it’s time to check yourself and cut back. Confidently limit your work hours when it’s necessary.
* If it’s impossible to finish your work tasks without working extra hours, seek help in completing them. Learn to delegate everything you can and if it’s still too much for you, talk to your boss about lightening your workload.
3. Make quick notes. When you’re at work and you have a thought about something to attend to at home, jot it down in a little notebook you keep with you. If you prefer, speak it into your voice recording on your cell phone or tap it into your smartphone.
* This method, of course, works the other way, too – when at home, make a note of what pops into your head about work.
* Using this technique will help you feel like you’re more in control of your life.
4. Give yourself a break. To bolster your efforts, recognize life isn’t easy at times. After all, you’re just one person and you’re compelled to accomplish a lot of things in a day.
* Strive to be gentle with yourself when it comes to managing your time.
5. Ask your partner. What’s their opinion about how you’ve been managing work and home? Do they believe you spend too much time at work or home, neglecting the other aspect of your life? What do they feel would help?
* Patiently listen and then share your own feelings about the imbalance in your life.
* If you wholly embrace your partner’s feedback, you’ll be more motivated to work out scheduling snafus between work and home.
6. Re-discover confidence in yourself. You can do anything you put your mind to, including balancing your time between work and home.
7. Be realistic and flexible. Maybe a perfect balance between work and home isn’t entirely possible. If you’re realistic, you’ll see that life ebbs and flows and what must be achieved at home and at work varies and fluctuates. Be proactive in your planning whenever possible.
If you put these strategies to work, you’ll feel much more capable of effectively organizing your busy life. Find an equilibrium that works for you to live a serene and satisfied existence.
Feb 2013 Yellow Pages Of Finance
The Truth About Being Laid Off and How to Thrive in Spite of It
The loss of a job in these tumultuous economic times can be pretty scary. But being free from your job can also motivate you to finally do what you’ve always wanted to do. Being laid off could be your golden opportunity to change your life for the better.
But how do you move past the feelings of devastation and take advantage of the situation?
Use these strategies to emotionally deal with your lay-off and thrive:
1. Avoid panic. Remind yourself that you’ve successfully made it through tough times before. Remember, too, that you’re not alone. Others are going through what you’re experiencing right now.
* You can focus better and think more clearly when you consciously keep from giving in to panic. Practice deep breathing and meditating. Listen to music that calms you.
2. Catch your breath. Process what happened – the reason(s) you lost the job. Was it a lay-off, a company down-size, or based on your work performance? Gain an understanding of why it happened.
* Allowing yourself time to think will help you move forward and leave regrets behind.
3. Give yourself a break. Regardless of the reason, tell yourself that it was somehow destiny that you be “released” from the job. Avoid blaming yourself too harshly.
* Even if there were something you could have done differently, derive the life lesson and forgive yourself.
4. View your situation as a fresh start. Consider that book closed. You’re now beginning a brand new story. Be optimistic. It’s so good for the soul to be able to go down a new path in your journey. Who doesn’t love a “do-over?”
5. See the silver lining. Ponder the idea that any difficulties you had at your former job are gone now. You’re looking at those old challenges in the rearview mirror. Ignite your passion for the future.
6. Consider your contacts. Who do you know who owns their own business? Do they need any help? What about your friends’ relatives and business contacts?
* Tactfully inquire if your peeps know anyone who could use some help right now. Let them know you’re available. Strive to discover every avenue to a new job.
7. Open your mind to temporary work. You’ll be surprised at how much short-term employment is available through temp services, both online and in your community.
* Endeavor to focus less on the amount you’ll be paid and more on the opportunities that could be opening up for you. Look at it this way: anywhere you go to work you’ll be meeting new people, learning new things, and establishing business contacts.
8. Use this time to get training and education. You might be able to get funding to pursue the training or education you want or need. Check your local colleges, universities, and tech centers to find programs that are offering generous financial support. Move forward and expand your skills and know-how.
* You never know what can happen when you get some new knowledge. Plus, you’ll also make new job contacts by obtaining training and education.
9. Follow your dreams. Is there something you’ve always wanted to do with your life? Now may be the chance you’ve needed to take that first step toward establishing the life you really want to live. Put your fears and insecurities behind you. Strengthen your resolve and go for it.
10. Embrace the unknown with grace and enthusiasm. True, the unknown is scary. Sometimes though, it’s exciting and even life-changing. When you approach your jobless situation with optimism and confidence as if it’s a big adventure, you’ll likely experience positive results.
Losing your job can be the first step toward discovering the life you’ve dreamed about for years. Apply the above strategies to strengthen your efforts and energize your spirit to move toward your future with excitement.
Smart Strategies For Clarifying Workplace Expectations
You can save a lot of time and do your job better when you know what is expected of you. Clear communications about job requirements are good for both companies and their employees. Whether you’re an employee or the boss, try these methods to clarify workplace expectations.
If You’re a New Employee:
1. Use your interview time well. Interviews are usually conducted in a limited amount of time so be sure to cover everything important. In addition to presenting your background and accomplishments, focus on the new position and how you can contribute.
2. Read the job description. A comprehensive and precise job description is a valuable guide. Get familiar with the reporting relationships and opportunities for growth as well as the basic qualifications and responsibilities. Flesh out the details if anything seems vague.
3. Study the handbook. Read your new employee handbook cover to cover. Pay attention to the tone as well as the text. Keep it on hand so you can refer to it whenever you have a question.
4. Divide the orientation into multiple sessions. It’s easy to feel overwhelmed when you’re starting a new job. Breaking up the orientation over the course of the week may enable you to stay alert and absorb more information.
5. Restate assignments. If you’re unsure what your supervisor is asking for, try repeating the assignment back to them.
If You’re the Boss:
1. Go on retreat at least once a year. Retreats serve an important function. Put daily operations on hold to gather together for some planning and strategizing.
2. Use a variety of instructional techniques. An orientation can be more than passive listening. Employees will learn better if you throw in some play acting and discussion groups.
3. Exchange feedback regularly. Avoid unpleasant surprises at the yearly employee evaluations by having supervisors and colleagues check in with each other regularly. Be open to constructive criticism and suggestions.
4. Standardize tasks and evaluation criteria. Consistent standards help things to run smoothly. Develop templates for common tasks and measurements. Create timelines and checklists for frequently recurring events like board meetings and financial audits.
5. Recognize good performance. People need to know what they’re doing well. Send out written acknowledgements of outstanding deeds. Pick an employee of the month.
6. Publish the dress code. Business casual means different things to different people. Spell out polo shirts and khakis if t-shirts and jeans are too informal for your workplace.
7. Articulate values. Talking about values gives everyone an opportunity to reflect on what they’re doing and why. Make the discussion ongoing. Establish your priorities in areas like customer service and environmental stewardship.
8. Assign realistic workloads. Set expectations with existing resources in mind. As many workplaces reduce the number of employees, sustainable progress depends on setting goals that people can achieve and maintain over the long term.
9. Strive to be inclusive. People generally work harder towards goals that they have a voice in developing. Involve employees in the process of drafting short and long term goals and the steps it will take to become successful.
10. Aim high. Ambitious expectations can fuel superior performance. Encourage everyone to dream big. Visualize what you would want your organization to look like in an ideal world.
You’ll feel more confident and productive when you figure out up front what your job demands. Working together to get a clear picture of your roles lays the groundwork for developing a stronger and more effective team.
Increase Your Success in All Areas of Life by Discovering Your Natural Talents
Although most of us can speak right up if someone inquires about our weaker points, we’re often less in tune with what we do well. However, knowing what you can excel at contributes to your capacity for success.
So, how much do you know about your talents? How can you discover more about the things you do really well?
Try these strategies to discover your natural talents:
1. Ask each of your parents. Your parents have observed your behavior and temperament through all your stages of development. They’ll know more than anyone what skills you’ve shown, even as a young child.
* Listening to their stories can be very inspiring. Consider yourself on a mission to discover your true gifts.
* What does your dad think you’re good at? Your mom’s observations will likely be somewhat different than what your dad says.
* Perhaps you can ask your grandparents as well.
2. Pay attention during job evaluations. One of the best ways to find out about what you’re good at is to listen to what your boss says during your job evaluations. Strive to be optimistic during your evaluations and analyze the feedback.
3. Listen to comments and advice from others. You’re being given an opportunity to learn from how others see you. They might help you discover a talent that you weren’t aware of.
4. Complete an interest inventory or aptitude test at a local community college. These types of tests are often free or low-cost. They ask very specific questions about your own opinions of yourself. Open up and answer honestly and fully.
* The test results highlight your top interests, which you can then pursue to find out which ones you’re best at. Even if it costs $10 to $50 to take these tests, the information you gain will be worth it.
5. What do you think you’re good at? If you believe you do well at something, you’ll focus on it, do it more often, and develop pride in your accomplishments. Write down the skills in which you think you excel.
6. Consider all aspects of life. A hobby you enjoy could become a lucrative career. Your relationship skills might make you the best parent ever. Becoming aware of your natural talents could move your life forward in wonderful ways you never even considered before.
* At work, in what areas do others ask you for help?
* At home, what can you complete in the blink of an eye?
* What tasks do you look forward to doing?
* Do you enjoy making up a story to tell your child at bedtime?
* Have you developed your own weight loss program or meditation plan?
* Maybe design comes natural to you. Do others compliment your home or yard?
Recognizing what you do best can contribute to truly living the life you’ve always dreamed of. Take some time this week to assess the skills you do well. Increase your chances for success now by determining the things you excel at. Your life’s journey can become one great adventure!
Fast-Track Your Career With Personal Branding
In today’s world, it’s important to take your personal brand seriously if you want others to take you seriously. Try out these tips for understanding the importance of personal branding, defining your own personal brand, and marketing your brand for greater career success.
Understanding the Importance of Personal Branding
Your personal brand helps you to:
1. Prosper as a free agent. Your personal brand is your reputation. It’s the way others see you. If you’re like most people, you may be switching jobs and employers regularly. Your personal brand is an asset you can take with you wherever you go.
2. Chart your own direction. Your brand will help you to establish goals, priorities and action plans. Even while taking care of daily obligations, you’ll have a bigger picture in mind.
3. Serve others. Self promotion can go too far, so it’s easy to think that branding is somehow vain or self-absorbed. In reality, your personal brand shows the positive impact you can have on other people and the world around you.
Defining Your Own Personal Brand
These tips will help you create an outstanding personal brand:
1. Take an inventory. Take a good look at yourself. Write out your strengths and weaknesses. Identify your passions. Think about what you’re good at and what you like to do.
2. Distinguish yourself from your colleagues. There are plenty of talented and dependable people in every field. Pinpoint your unique selling point. Maybe you’re a gas station owner who maintains the cleanest bathrooms in town.
3. Talk about benefits. Let your target audience know what you can do for them. Explain how you can boost profits by increasing sales or saving money.
4. Summarize your mission in 10 seconds or less. Be prepared to capture people’s attention quickly. Let them know what you do in 15 words or less. You can tell you’re on the right track when they ask for more details.
5. Ask for feedback. Survey your family, friends, customers and colleagues to find out what they think of you and your abilities. Show your appreciation for constructive criticism so they’ll keep sharing it with you.
6. Stay updated. Review your personal mission statement every six months. Make new action plans so you’re always getting closer to your goals.
Marketing Your Personal Brand
Use these strategies to expand your reach:
1. Increase your visibility. Post fresh content on your website or blog regularly. Stay active in social media. Look for opportunities to teach classes, give presentations, or write articles in your field.
2. Build buzz. Collect samples of positive feedback you get in the workplace. Assemble testimonials from happy clients and encourage them to make referrals. Word of mouth is often more effective and certainly cheaper than paid advertising.
3. Tell your success stories. Craft brief anecdotes about your accomplishments that showcase your skills and make you proud. Rehearse telling them so you sound natural.
4. Monetize your contribution. Numbers sound convincing. Try to quantify the value you can deliver. For example, if you’re pitching your IT services to a small business owner, discuss how much money they can save by signing up with you for monthly maintenance visits that reduce the risk of expensive repairs and downtime.
5. Put together a dream team. It’s difficult to go it alone. Cultivate your network. Help others to market their brand and they’re more likely to do the same for you. Team up with complementary partners. Exchange services like cooking meals for a friend who cuts your hair.
Branding used to be for cattle and big corporations, but now everyone is in on the act. Take charge of your personal brand to achieve more career success and guide your life in a direction that is meaningful for you.
Raise Your Performance Level by Harnessing the Power of Social Facilitation
Social facilitation is a fancy term for the tendency to perform better when we’re working alongside others or just being watched. It’s so basic that even bugs do it. Learn how the presence of others affects your behavior and harness that power to do everything better.
General Principles Related To Social Facilitation
Try these tips to use social facilitation to your advantage:
1. Engage in friendly comparisons. Studies show cyclists pedal faster when they bike together. It’s natural to try to keep up with the person next to you or exceed their output.
2. Focus on effort. Observing the accomplishments of others inspires us to see new possibilities. We can see that success is based on hard work rather than being a matter of luck or a special talent.
3. Surround yourself with reminders. There’s a good reason why many workplaces put up a list of top employees or sales figures.
* Give yourself something to strive for by noting the benchmarks you want to surpass.
4. Capitalize on good moods. Social facilitation works best when we’re in good spirits. Hit the gym for an early morning yoga session. You’ll feel more relaxed and convivial.
5. Visualize some company. If you’re on your own, you can still take advantage of the audience effect. For example, imagine experts are watching you and admiring your technique as you wash your car.
6. Encourage attentiveness. Naturally, attentive audiences have more impact than those who are dozing off. Engage your audience and be an enthusiastic observer when your time comes to cheer others on.
7. Promote accountability. It’s hard to tell if anyone is slacking off when a lot of people are moving one piece of heavy furniture. Build in ways to measure individual performance.
8. Understand the opposite sex effect. Audiences of the opposite gender can sometimes inhibit performance if they make people nervous or distracted. Keep that in mind if the choir at your all girl’s school sounds off key when they first venture out.
9. Seek solitude for tricky stuff. In contrast, we all tend to do better at new or complicated tasks when we can rehearse in private. Practice a new card trick before you show it to your friends. Work on your backhand in between tennis lessons.
Specific Applications of Social Facilitation:
1. Work in teams. Many workplaces encourage employees to work in teams. You can also take the initiative to ask your supervisor to let you take over the conference room to assemble meeting materials or other group tasks.
2. Give your laptop an afternoon out. Coffee shops and libraries are usually full of people who find they get more work done in public than if they lounge around at home.
* Even strangers can help each other out just by congregating in one place.
3. Find a fitness buddy. Enlist a family member or friend to help you stick to your exercise regimen and other healthy lifestyle habits.
* We’re more likely to stay on track when someone else knows what we’re doing.
4. Sign up for group activities. Almost anything that we do can be adapted for sharing with others. Put together a weekly poker night or basketball game. If you love to read, form a book club.
5. Throw a party. It’s easy to feel isolated in a digital world. Stay in practice for socializing and cooperating with others. Accept more party invitations or throw your own. Work on your small talk and seek out opportunities to help others.
Put the power of social facilitation to work for you. Sharing activities promotes fun and productivity. It will be easier to accomplish your goals if you team up with others or just imagine you’re playing to an audience.
Prepare Your Mind for Prosperity: 10 Ways to Think Like a Winner
Have you heard the saying, “Attitude is everything”? This adage reveals a great truth: the perspective you take in any situation ultimately determines the outcome. So if you’re hoping to bring prosperity into your life, it’s important to learn to think like a winner.
How can you acquire the mindset of a winner?
Try these strategies:
1. Acknowledge that you’re human. You’re fallible because you’re human. Rather than seeking perfection, strive to attain the abundance that presents itself to you.
2. Know what you want. Be specific about what you’re trying to accomplish. For example, if you’re running a marathon, perhaps your goal is to complete the race or to finish and not be in last place.
3. Aim high but not too high. Using the marathon example, if you’re running a marathon for the first time, you could aim to finish in the top half of the group.
4. Refuse to set yourself up for failure. Setting unrealistically high expectations is strategically not the best plan. If you lack experience or expertise in something, rather than saying, “I’m going to be number one,” say “I’m so proud of myself for going after my dreams. As long as I complete this task, I’m a winner.”
5. Embrace compliments from others. Do you shrug off kind words from others? If so, it’s time to recognize that most of us don’t go out of our way to praise another unless we’re quite impressed with something they did.
* When you prosper, people take note of it and often comment about it. Accept praise and compliments from others with open arms and keep up the great work!
6. Do a personal inventory. Take stock of when you’ve been the most prosperous in your life.
* What are your major successes?
* What have you done well?
* What are you the most proud of?
7. Remind yourself of your positive character traits. Spend some time making the connection between who you are and the abundance you’ve already received in your life.
8. Recognize prosperity comes in all “flavors.” Although money is a nice way to show notice of your stellar performance, you can also prosper in other ways. You might get more perks at work. Maybe you’ll be recognized in your field by getting an award. Perhaps you’ll become the “go to” person whenever people are facing a challenge.
9. See the power you have in your own life. When you take responsibility to traverse life’s challenges on your own terms, you’ll truly feel your own strength. You will prosper when you step up and make the decision to prosper.
10. Find the successes in your daily actions. However a situation concludes, consider your actions and what you did well. After a particularly challenging event, take some time to determine the positive aspects of the experience.
* For example, if you submitted a project plan to your boss, that, in itself, is something to feel good about.
* Even if your boss ultimately went with a different plan, you gained work experience in the process. You stuck to something and followed through. Your boss will remember those things. Ultimately, you’ll prosper in some way from the experience.
What you believe about yourself and a situation before it occurs determines whether you’ll reap the benefits of that situation. So, prepare your mindset for prosperity by thinking like a winner. You’ll live the prosperous life of your dreams!
Stop Criticizing Yourself in 6 Steps
We’ve all heard it – that inner voice that speaks up whenever we’ve just messed up. Sometimes, your critical inner voice tells you what you should have done but didn’t. Other times, it reminds you of something you did that you could have avoided.
Whenever you have a running dialogue with yourself about how you’re falling short in your behavior, your self-criticism is racing right along with you.
How can you quiet that voice before it destroys your self-esteem and confidence?
Follow this 6-step process:
1. Analyze the criticisms. Point by point, what does your inner voice say? Jot it down so you can reflect on what you feel you’re doing wrong. One by one, go through the points and ask yourself, “Is this really valid?” If so circle it. If not, cross it off your list.
2. Figure out when the criticisms began. For example, if you say to yourself, “You’ll never be successful at anything,” take time to resolve why you feel that way deep down inside.
* You’ll likely discover a time when an authority figure was overly critical of you. Unfortunately, uninformed adults can devastate the self-esteem of little kids around them when they use negative, accusatory, or demeaning words directed at them.
3. Let it go. Release any negative remarks from your repertoire that stem from those early experiences. Why? Because they simply hold no validity for you now.
* They came from a mixed-up, unhappy, or otherwise unskilled adult who was unaware of the impact of their words. Don’t let your inner voice keep repeating these false criticisms! They’re untrue. Take an active stance to discard them.
* Release yourself from the unhealthy mantras of your history. Give yourself permission to let go of any negative statement that prevents you from moving forward and being successful in life. Empower yourself by omitting this negativity from your life.
4. Acknowledge that self-criticism can be damaging. If you continue to repeat the negative statements, it can be crippling to you and even block your path on your journey to the life you deserve.
* Realize that no one can function well when being told constantly that he cannot persevere and rise above his struggles.
* Running yourself down emotionally isn’t the answer to anything.
5. Counter your critical voice with your supportive, caring self. Instead of thinking, “I won’t be good at swimming,” think, “This is a good opportunity for me to work on learning something new. I’ll embark on this adventure with an open mind.”
* Embrace a more encouraging part of you that speaks positively.
* Designate your supportive, caring voice as the one in charge. You can learn to be your strongest supporter.
6. Stay focused. Rather than allow your critical inner voice to get the best of you, continue with your plan full speed ahead. You can challenge the validity of any criticism simply by continuing with your efforts to accomplish your desires.
Quieting your critical inner voice is one of the wisest things you’ll ever do. When you apply this process, you’ll discover a more serene, happy existence along your incredible journey of life. Go ahead and get started now! You deserve it.
You Have the Power to Heal Your Shame
Shame is a complex human emotion that we all experience at one time or another. You might feel shame because of something about your appearance, events related to your family, or even a lack of education. You might feel you’re not worthy somehow. Shame shows itself in many forms.
Even if you struggle greatly with managing your shame, trust in the knowledge that you can heal it.
Consider the following methods to strengthen your emotional health and soothe your spirit:
1. Identify shame’s presence. Because we tend to try to cover up that which embarrasses or demeans us, you’ll probably need to do some personal confrontation of your own emotions.
* Are there particular people in whose presence you feel embarrassed? If so, why?
* Perhaps when you’re in a specific type of situation, you notice that you tend to close down emotionally or feel numb.
* Begin to take note of when your emotions are either stirred up or flat (which means you feel nothing at all).
2. Recognize you’re “only as sick as your secrets.” In the counseling profession, there is a saying: “We’re only as sick as our secrets.” This adage means that the things about ourselves that we keep to ourselves are the exact issues that we need to acknowledge and do something about.
3. Consider discussing your shame with someone you trust. Because shame can be a tough emotion to handle, it’s helpful to have someone you can talk to about it. Whether it’s a close friend, your partner, or a professional, it will free you to put words on those feelings.
* The more you talk about it, the better you’ll be able to gain some understanding about what triggers your feelings of shame. Not only that, but also talking about your shame de-mystifies it and makes it something real that you can resolve.
* A mental health or counseling professional is trained to facilitate people in identifying their troubling issues and learning to understand and manage challenging feelings. If you believe you could benefit from this type of assistance, by all means, avail yourself of it.
4. Be brave. It requires courage to share your insecurities with another person. Your bravery reveals your passion, strength, and optimism.
5. Learn to love yourself. No matter what your shortcomings, you deserve to experience the uplifting feelings you can get from self-love. Even though you think you have a lot of spiritual “blemishes,” you must allow yourself to see your real beauty within.
6. Connect with your spiritual power. Whether it’s your religion, an interest in Eastern philosophy, or a strong belief in Mother Earth, establish a connection with whatever spiritual power you believe in.
* When you have a spiritual power you can lean on, you’ll likely find solace and the strength to face and resolve your personal shame.
7. Have confidence that you’ll overcome. At some point in life, we all have our difficulties to deal with, our challenges to manage. Reach deep within yourself and you’ll find the confidence to persevere.
* Remember that you’ve resolved challenges before and know that you can conquer this one, too.
Shame is a normal human emotion that we’ve all felt. If you’re willing to do the work, you can resolve the hurt and shame you feel inside. Use the methods outlined above to move forward toward a happier, more rewarding life. You do have the power to heal your shame.
Want to Leave a Legacy? 8 Ways You Can Make a Lasting Difference
Do you wish to do great things that profoundly impact the lives of others? It’s nice to know that you can have such an effect even if you don’t consider yourself wealthy or influential. Simply open your eyes to the possibilities floating around you!
Here are some ways to bring light to the lives of others:
1. Notice others. It can be a challenge to actually see those who are right in front of you. Consider the custodian at work, the elderly man who walks his dog past your house each day, or the sales clerk at the convenience store.
* We all offer something of value to the world. Focus on who is around you and acknowledge their presence.
2. Make a personal comment. A kind word, funny statement, or short conversation can make a positive impact on another person’s day – or sometimes, even their life.
* “You did such a good job with that” or “Your colors are perfectly coordinated today” tell others you have interest in them.
3. Emit positivity. No matter where you are, nothing has a greater effect than a positive person in the crowd. Be that person.
4. Keep your eyes and ears open to the needs of others. Maybe an unemployed neighbor has a teenage daughter who desires to complete a training program for her dream career. Unfortunately, the program costs $500 and your neighbor cannot afford to pay this fee for his daughter. Can you?
* What would it mean to you and that young lady if you’re willing to pay for the training that will make her dreams come true?
* You’ll be exhilarated once you begin to give what you can to others in ways that will enhance their lives. You simply cannot imagine this feeling until you’ve experienced it.
5. Be willing to give your time to something worthwhile. What if a friend needed to complete a class but had no babysitter for her child? Would you step up and offer your babysitting services free of charge? Think about how appreciative she would be.
* Perhaps, at first, she wouldn’t accept your offer. There may be times like these where you must insist in order to help another. The experience will be quite rewarding for you.
6. Be brave. Whenever you reach outside your comfort zone to affect others, it will feel different, awkward or a bit uncomfortable at first. Embrace the idea of doing something to affect another person in ways you might not even understand or realize right now. Exude your confidence in the process. Try it and see what happens.
7. Start your own “slush fund” for contributing to the lives of those who need it. The total amount is less important than your intentions to do something that matters.
* If you want to give a larger amount than you have right now, save a little at a time. If you bank $50 a month, at the end of a year you’ll have $600 to contribute.
* You’ll be surprised at the opportunities you’ll discover to do something great for someone. Your generosity can change their life for the better.
8. Think of the long-term effects of your contributions. When evaluating situations to determine whether to help, consider the long-term consequences.
* For example, giving $500 for a complete training program for someone who’ll retain ongoing employment because of it is profoundly affecting. However, giving that same $500 to someone to pay their bills for one month without future plans for change may not be your preferred way of contributing.
* Babysitting someone’s child for 6 months while they attend evening classes to complete their bachelor’s degree will ultimately have a greater effect than loaning someone money to install stereo speakers in his vehicle.
If you want to contribute to the lives of others, look around you. It’s exciting to know that with a bit of extra money, time, or work, you can dramatically change the life of another person forever. Commit now to make a difference and leave a legacy. You’ll be amazed at the renewed passion you feel for your own journey!
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